Batsy is one of the oldest and most powerful entities in the known universe. She was born a demigod at the beginning of known time and is the mother of all carnal desire, worshipped by the mascots of Omega Mart as the profane mother of consumerism. Batsy got totally burnt out on the whole deity thing, so she’s been easing into a relaxed and good-natured kind of wisdom over the eons, satisfied with saying and doing just exactly whatever it is she wants.
Back in 1972, Batsy fell in love with a beautiful, androgynous, divine being of light named Angel. Batsy heard them playing the pedal steel at a two-steppin honky tonk, spinning a spell of slinky, sliding melodies that enraptured her in an absolute state of bliss. The two have been inseparable ever since, touring the country, playing music, lowkey grifting marks who deserve it, selling knock off merch in arena parking lots, and literally just having the best time. Batsy also just started dating Cisco, bass player for Moody Rainbows & the Cadillac Rattlers. Batsy, Cisco, and Angel couldn’t be happier about it, too.
Eventually, in March of 1985, Batsy wound up in Houston, Texas, and hung around as she just couldn’t get enough of the late night country music show playing on ETNL. When she finally did decide to scoot, her van broke down, so she took it as a sign she ought to stay put. Clinkin’ drinks at a nasty old tavern, she befriended Arnie Dilly, an old-timer lookin’ to throw in the towel as the saloon's owner and barkeep with half a mind to sell the place right then and there.
Batsy took a slow, measured look around and said, “This has got to be the slummiest, grungiest, beat-down nastiest, dank little two-bit trough of swill-spillin' nasties I ever did see. I love it. How much you want for it?”
Ironing out the details took all of five minutes. Batsy and Dilly spat and shook hands, and that was that. Batsy picked up the radial and started spinnin numbers: “Hey there hun, this is Batsy. I’m perfect, hun, how are you? Good sugar, glad to hear. Just wanted to call and ask you to spread the word. I’m runnin’ a waterin’ hole in Texas now, you tell all them golden sweeties upstairs and them shitkickers on the southside to come on through. We got plenty of love for everyone over here in Cowboix Hevvven.”
In no time at all, angels, demons, and wild critters alike started pourin’ in, and it’s been the same incredible night for the last 37 years.